Everything can be wonderful...

Im not happy....mayb I am...I dunnoe what I'm feeling...I'm a lil lost, confuse...losta mixed feeling inside me. Y?

I came to work on time today. Finally. And guess wad? Everyone else is late, I waited a whole one and a half hour before Chad came to open the door. I finished 1 presentation, and there's like 2 more to go. Must finish everything by tuesday. But seriously, I got no mood to even feel anything about work.

*To the boy*
If you're here...pls dun read this entry....stop here.





The boy recieved the long awaited letter from the government. The enlistment letter. And what really happened is not quite what all of us expected. He is posted to police. All these while, it's like his dream to go into army and now heaven have to play such a cruel joke on him. POLICE. You know, his mum, his family...everybody feels happy cause its so near his house and by right I should feel happy too cause I'll get to meet him everyweek. Friday book out, Wednesday sometimes got nights out and less stressful. But I know...tht's not what he wanted. The whole night he was sooo dejected. I don't know what to sae to him. I tried to sae things like, "maybe you'll like it there?" "How different can army be from police." When I clearly know nothing I sae can make him feel better.

He said.

'You know it's my dream to go army.'

After tht, I can't think of anything else to say cause, although Im not in his shoes, I've been to the point of giving my dream up before. But I manage to stick tru it. But for his case there's nothing he can do. It's the government's decision. I know he's been thinking of going to Army for a taste first, if things really work out, he'd sign on. But now, tht hope is all dashed. I rather tht letter nv came...

I really want him to cheer up, but I know it's gonna take sometime. I can't help but think...Y? There are soo many ppl out there who dread army. They find means and ways to skip it or avoid it, but for someone who's actually looking forward to becoming a soldier, can't be one.

Y is it so unfair?