Un-Happy Anniversary

Today is Our 14th month Anniversary. Somehow this time things didn't turn out too well. We had a good time yesterday, i muz admit i was totally tire out, but it was nice walking ard chinatown.

Today i had to work, its also Elly's last day. The moment William saw me in the morning he asked if i could help out next week coz since Elly is leaving, he need someone to guide the new staff. I tot it'll b quick bucks b4 new year and i really wanna give my mum some money to let her haf a good year, so i agreed. I told Yao n he got pissed again. He even hung up the fone on me. Well...in case u dun know, i hate tht. Nobody hangs up the fone on me and he has already done this for the 3rd time. I got really pissed n all i wanted was to get the hell outta greenhouse.

I was hoping i won't bump into him when he come to work...so i tried very hard to hide frm him when i went off. well....things juz can't turn out the way i want them to. I met him.

"going off?"

i couldn't answer...i juz walked off...i didn't know how to react to the totally different attitude he's giving me. I was scared. I left. didn't even said a final good bye to my dear elly since she's leaving.

I went to Esplanade for a walk to cool down, came home n started packing my room. I wanted to do something to make yao happy. I wana let him know im trying to b useful. Half way thru packing, i got tired n decided to give him a call, wanted to tell him sorry bout juz now. but his fone was off. i called GH and asked if KC could get him to the fone. He came.

"ya?"

"erm...what r u doing? R u buzy?"

"ya"

silent

"then nvm loh"

then he hung up again....wanna know how i feel now?
TOTALLY SUCK! damn....i feel so terrible i can't concentrate on packing my stuff...i raelly hope he could give me some encouragment n let me know tht he haf faith in me n tht i can accomplise anything i wanna do. Bud he nv called.

Im still waiting...he should be off to his break now...

Im very insecure n i need reassurance in wadeva i do. I need support. Im like so worthless w/o yao, w/o my family, w/o my friends. n i think yao is getting sick of tht.

what should i do?